Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Pet Peeve #23

I had a long & boring explanation for this, but ultimately decided that this Pet Peeve needs very little description....mostly because I have chosen to assume that my reading audience has common sense.

Why oh why do we waste senseless time & money on "studies" that draw conclusions that are obvious to any local moron? Furthermore, why do these genius scientists post their "findings" as new & radical discoveries that will change our lives forever? Stop insulting my intelligence with your pathetic analysis on common sense matter. Cancer patients say "Thanks for nothing."


It did not take much research to find examples of such useless studies.

1. Binge Drinking Impairs Decision Making
"A four year study of 200 college students found that those who drink heavily and started drinking at an early age demonstrate poor decision-making skills....."

2. Binge Drinkers Have Highest Risk of Injury
"Among moderate-drinking men who sometimes binged, the risk of injury were more than six times greater compared to male non-drinkers...."

3. When You Are Pregnant, Drinking Can Hurt Your Baby
"When you are pregnant, your baby grows inside you. Everything you eat and drink while you are pregnant affects your baby..."


4. Teen Girls More Likely To Text-&-Drive Than Teen Boys"

"According to a study released by The Allstate Foundation and National Organizations for Youth Safety, teenage girls are much more likely to engage in texting and driving than their male counterparts..."


5. Depressed students more likely to drop out

"Students with both depression and anxiety had especially poor academic performance...."


Like OMG, I can't believe #4 is true! Like, no way teen girls text more than boys....ahhh! I'm so annoyed!

8 comments:

Bill and Kel said...

I saw a study on the news in Michigan last week that suggested that those wishing to lose weight should cut back on soda. I mean, c'mon. Cutting calories helps lose weight? Craziness.

Anonymous said...

Actually what is more disturbing about this is that we would have enough morans in the world to have enough data that derives these types of study to exist...let alone call that level of intellegence - higher than commen sense. Relativity is a scary moment in this situation...

LJFredricks said...

The funny thing is people make fun of these studies and then are confused when they happen in real life.
2 examples that TOTALLY make me crazy are Kids and sugar consumption. Of course it makes kids hyper and yet people can't understand why Jimmy is so hyper when he has been drinking Mtn Dew and eating fruit snacks all day.

And SMOKING. (in smokers voice) Yeah I smoke but I am SURE it didn't cause my kids asthma.
GRRRR
Common sense is no longer common. It should be called endangered sense.

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